| OPINION
| SEPTEMBER 14, 2005
Idiots in Love
Don’t let your mind turn
to mush when you’re hanging around your crush
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| The Shorthorn: Alex Pierce |
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There is a mysterious force in the universe
that can cause people to feel like a million bucks or like their
world has come to an end. It is a force that can lead them to do
things they never in their right mind would do. It can cause them
to do things others might consider stupid, but this force often
blesses them with blindness to their stupidity. Everyone has or
will feel it eventually because not feeling it at one time or another
is to not be human. This cosmic force is commonly referred to as
love.
Finding love is like trying to grab a fish and pull it out of water.
Often we fumble around like idiots trying to catch it and sometimes
just end up falling face first into the water. And, once we finally
catch it, we hold on with all of our might, usually causing the
fish to slip through our hands back into the water. The question
I am exploring is, why does this happen to us?
I cannot remember ever not liking girls. In fact, I think I had
my first girlfriend when I was in kindergarten. We would sit by
each other at lunch, share food and walk together to recess. Back
then the only thing you needed to woo the ladies was the chocolate
pudding your mom packed in your lunch box. You would trade a girl
her apple for your pudding, and you were in. If only things were
still that simple: love for the price of a six pack of pudding.
Whenever we first meet someone or are friends with them, it is often
easy to talk to them. Usually, topics of discussion come naturally,
and we are full of clever jokes. Everything will be going great,
but once we decide, “Hey, I really like this person,”
all of those discussion topics and clever limericks just disappear,
like magic. This is the point where we start repeating ourselves
and try too hard to be funny, often resulting in disaster. You can
confirm this is happening to you when you find yourself in an awkward
conversation wondering, “Why the hell am I talking about light
bulbs? I like this person.”
Is there some hidden force that causes us to lose our cool? How
can we start acting like ourselves again? Usually, the reason we
find ourselves without something to say around the people we care
about is because we are so worried about impressing them that we
try too hard not to say anything dim-witted. This act often leaves
us struggling for something to say with drool running down our chins
and the sound of crickets in the background. This situation reaches
its peak of sadness when you find yourself thinking of funny things
to say ahead of time before seeing the person.
So far, I have discovered only one remedy for this stupidity: The
person you are trying to impress has to see past your gibberish
and express his or her feelings for you. Once you know you like
each other, it is as if a cloud has been lifted and all is good
again. You start talking about relevant things, and jokes are plentiful.
But, if the person does not see past your absentmindedness, I am
sorry to say, but you are probably screwed, so you might as well
find someone else. After all, if the person doesn’t like you
for who you are — even in your stupid state — then you
should look elsewhere. Just keep in mind that there is someone out
there for everyone, and eventually you will find someone who understands
why you become so unlike your usual self.
If all else fails, the college version of the six-pack would likely
win them over.
— Jordan Taylor is a journalism sophomore and Opinion editor
for The Shorthorn.
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