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OPINION
| FEBRUARY 06, 2004
Guest Column
Same-Sex, Same Rights
The ‘American family’
should include homosexual couples
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| The Shorthorn: Ryan Hartsell |
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President Bush, in the State of the Union
address, said we must help the American family.
I agree that families need help. What I don’t agree with is
the definition of the American family. Bush’s definition of
family excludes all same-sex partners. This infuriates me because
I am a lesbian in a committed relationship planning to have a family
one day.
President Bush talked about making a constitutional amendment to
ban same-sex marriages because judges were trying to promote the
issue. A case from Texas went to the Supreme Court, which deemed
all sodomy laws to be unconstitutional. The Massachusetts Supreme
Court decided that banning same-sex marriage was unconstitutional.
The judges who made these decisions were not debating the morality
of the issue. They could not find in our laws any place that states
it is illegal. This is one of the first times the gay community
has stood up for itself and demanded equal treatment. So for a country
that claims to be the land of the free, why is there a fight to
change freedom?
We have had many battles for equal rights. These battles have been
fought so every job application states in small print that you will
not be discriminated against due to sex, race, creed or color. We
have fought for the minorities’ right to vote. We have lost
“separate but equal” in an attempt to make all of us
feel legitimately equal. These were important victories for everyone
those discriminations affected. How can we continue to deny the
right to commit to the person you love?
Straight couples do not even have to get married to have that commitment.
In 16 states, including Texas, all a couple has to do is live together
for a period of time, refer to themselves as married, file a joint
tax return and intend to someday get married. That couple is now
in a common-law marriage that other states will recognize.
Some people have a problem with same-sex marriage because of the
church. Marriage is seen as a holy joining of a man and a woman
in the eyes of God. All right, I can respect that. If you want to
keep the term “marriage” on the basis of religion, that
is fine. I am not offended with the term “civil union.”
I simply want to legitimize my existence in this country. I want
to know that if anything happens to me, my partner would have the
same rights to my benefits as anyone else would. I want us both
to have the same legal grounds as parents. I would like us to be
on one insurance policy. I would like to be able to call my partner
my wife without explaining that we have had a ceremony but didn’t
travel out of state to get a certificate that means nothing here.
For centuries, marriage in general was a legal contract for financial
profit. Children were sold to the highest bidder for money and esteem.
Did the church or the government have any problem with that? People
fought to marry for love. In this country today, arranged marriages
seem far removed and barbaric. We think we have evolved. Well, that
evolution is continuing.
Everyone is worried about children of gay parents. First of all,
homosexuality is not the same thing as pedophilia. Sometimes I think
people are more afraid that same-sex couples will raise homosexual
children. I can’t speak for every homosexual, but of all that
I do know, I don’t believe any of them would want to raise
a child to be gay. We have had it hard enough, and who wants their
children’s lives to be difficult?
We also know that no one made us be gay. That is just who we are.
The only choice we made is to be true to ourselves. Further, I don’t
know personally of any gay people coming from gay parents. I was
born to straight parents who are still married. My partner did as
well.
I’m not saying that a child’s life would not be different
because they had gay parents. Last November, a 7-year-old child
in Louisiana received disciplinary action because he told his classmate
his mother was gay. By denying same-sex couples equal protections
and rights under the law, the government is making such behavior
by educators acceptable.
Right-wing groups are afraid that granting us rights is like telling
the world that homosexuality is OK. They believe that being gay
is morally wrong. To put it quite frankly, I don’t need their
permission. I am a lesbian. I’m not going back into the closet
to appease them. We have always been around and always will be.
People were afraid of giving women the right to vote or African
Americans the right to sit at the front of the bus. How will it
actually affect right-wing conservatives that same-sex couples have
rights? It would mean that the law would have to look at us as equals
with the same rights as them.
Having said all of this, I realize that although there are setbacks,
I feel that times have changed. I am not afraid of telling people
of my sexual orientation. I do not fear for my life. I know that
most of the people around me, whether they agree with my lifestyle
or not, realize it is only a part of the whole person I am. They
are tolerant because they are different than everyone else as well.
Everyone deserves respect, and they get it by first respecting others.
—Linda Creglow is an art and art history senior.
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